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The Real Truth about Yankee DNA
http://www.wargame.ch/board/acwgc/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=21550
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Author:  TMiller [ Tue Apr 28, 2020 8:45 pm ]
Post subject:  The Real Truth about Yankee DNA

A frequently asked question is whether a child born in the South to a Yankee couple is officially a Southerner. The answer is NO. Yankee DNA does not change merely because of a person's location when born. If it did then yankees would be flying down by the thousands to have their children here.
Here are the scientific facts:
If a child is born to yankee parents while they are in the South then that child is still a yankee. DNA testing has confirmed this over and over again. Gene therapy has been attempted but donors have been difficult to find so progress in this area has been limited.
If the child marries a southerner they would have what we would call a mixed marriage. If the child marries a yankee then they are right back where they started and have made no progress whatsoever. This rarely happens since yankees hate each other even more than they hate southerners. It would be like eating at McDonalds when you live next to a 5 star restaurant.
Assuming the child of yankee parents marries a southerner, the children produced by that union would be eligible for full southern citizenship, but only under certain conditions. First of all, the original grandparents (full blooded yankees) need to be either dead or living in a foreign country. The reason for this is simple. Genetically, this child is still 50% yankee and any northern influence at this point could tip the scales and create yet another yankee. If you feel that the child needs grandparents then you may want to consider a surrogate program. The National Organization of Surrogate Elderly or NOOSE has a great program that provides grandparents in situations like this. The child will never know the difference and the results are phenomenal.
If two generations have passed and there has been no northern influence in a childs life then you should have yourself an honest to goodness southerner. But wait. There is no need to take any chances. Observe the child and look for the following characteristics –
Holding a door open for strangers.
Letting a lady go first in line. (applies to men)
Waving at neighbors.
Respecting people of all races.
Treating others like they would want to be treated.
Literacy and a desire to go beyond the 10th grade.
Calm Even Temper. No sudden outbursts of cursing.
Love of family and country.
Love for the south and all it stands for.
If they exhibit all these characteristics then it is safe to say that your families heritage has been forever altered. Congratulations

Author:  cameronm [ Wed Apr 29, 2020 3:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Real Truth about Yankee DNA

General Miller, a fine scientific work Suh. I have seen something similar on the history channel a few years ago. Down in my neck of the woods, the deepest south, we also have northern invaders wanting to improve their gene pool. The most quick and effective way we have found to identify these people and their pretend southern offspring is see if they can talk about rugby in an intelligent manner for at least 10 minutes, when they confuse it with soccer we have a northerner. Being a bit technically backward down our ways we do not yet have access to effective DNA testing, but I am sure when we do finally get it we will find a lot more of these northern kangaroos in our top paddock then we were aware of.

Author:  Mark Oakford [ Wed Apr 29, 2020 7:22 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Real Truth about Yankee DNA

General Cam,
Here was me thinking that the deeper South y' go, the Northern y' get when you're down our way. I believe you need to rethink your definitions, tho', because I played Rugby (Union) in my day...

Author:  Blake [ Wed Apr 29, 2020 7:56 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Real Truth about Yankee DNA

Funniest thing I have read this week.

Author:  cameronm [ Thu Apr 30, 2020 5:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Real Truth about Yankee DNA

General Miller, since you have shown yourself to be a true man of science I shall turn to you in my hour of genetic need. General Oakford has revealed himself as possibly having southern DNA. The key giveaway was when he added on the word union to Rugby. Now Rugby Union (not to be confused with the evil Union) is the pure version of football and only a person who would know such a thing would be a southern gentleman from the very deepest southern states (those in the southern hemisphere). So I have a quandary, we have a northerner who may have or had southern DNA. So my questions are “If you have southern DNA, but fight for the Union does that impact the southern DNA?” “Will the southern DNA change over time”? “Will the southern DNA rebel and force General Oakford back into the Grey?” “Is General Oakford sentenced to a life of confusion and self-doubt? As I write this I become more and more concerned for the man, he could be living in a tortured hell. Is there a help group he could contact, could NOOSE help in any way? Your guidance in this matter would be much appreciated.

Author:  Mark Oakford [ Thu Apr 30, 2020 8:11 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Real Truth about Yankee DNA

General Miller, I think more science is needed to be brought into this conversation between learned men.

While I can understand General Cam's fixation with the Northern Hemisphere's notion of North and South, you may consider the notion that in the Southern Hemisphere these things are reversed. North is South and South is North and all is still right with the world (since one can't get too much further South than I am) and there is no need of re-education for me. Maybe further education is needed for General Cam, who seems to be getting his Norths and Souths muddled between Hemispheres.

General Cam's use of Rugby Union to try and tie that great game to the Southern cause is a bit spurious and tries to reduce the great game to a Southern (Northern Hemisphere) enterprise is spurious given the game was invented in England, a country somewhat further North than the Confederation of the Southern State's Northern borders! (Although I believe that it is played, under the same laws, somewhat differently in that far off, rain soaken land.) I believe that the game is also played in Canada (of all places!) Despite different playing styles between Northern and Southern Hemispheres, under the same Laws, Rugby Union is a world game (played everywhere, for you Northern Hemisphere Southerners) and, as such, is a force for Unification, for uniting all men and women. :)

Author:  L. Drummond [ Mon May 04, 2020 11:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Real Truth about Yankee DNA

General Miller, Sounds like mularkey to me! I do believe I saw a wanted poster outside this fine establishment with your name on it. You might want to skedaddle!

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