General-Leytenant Tartyshev, mon ami, I thank you for your kind words in respect of the honour bestowed upon me by l'Empereur. Before we go any further, I must reciprocate those feelings of respect and dare I say affection, for one of our most worthy adversaries. I mention of course, the addition to your own metal collection, and congratulate you on the award of the Kulm Cross.
Perhaps you too should look out for a new tailor to accommodate all the medals that are available to the Imperial Russian Army. I have heard tales of one in particular from North Korea, who is well versed in designing expanding jackets, breeches etc and therefore maximising space for a multitude of worthy and not so worthy adornments.
I appreciate that the Kulm Cross is awarded for battlefield prowess, but I must point out that the staff work commensurate with the organisation of a mighty French Corps d'Armée on campaign is not to be trivialised and carries its own dangers. There are risks involved on a daily basis. A sprained wrist from writing orders, back ache or splinters from being hunched over a table, banging a knee or dizziness on standing up from said tale to quickly, redness of the eyes from reading reports, stabbing your fingers while sharpening a quill, getting ink in your eye, being flattened by piles of falling paperwork and the worst of all, paper cuts! No sir, these threats are no less real, than those occasioned by musket balls, grape, lance or sabre.
I appreciate your attempts top lure me into the service of Alexander I, and although the offer of command of a Cossack Regiment holds a certain romantic charm, I have previously set out the reasons why such an adventure could never be accommodated.
May good fortune continue to preserve you on the field of honour. I salute you with a glass of "the water of life".
